Have nearly run myself ragged. This leads me to wonder why it is that I work so hard when I am not getting paid, but am afraid of getting a job that will pay me to work? Must be some weird sort of commitment phobia. Stayed out until 3:30ish last night and sang karaoke at local dive Miss Kitty's. Sober. That makes it even more scary, I think. Anyway had a great time with friends and won a Miss Kitty's T-shirt in a door prize drawing. Had a frightening impostor of piña colada in which Miss Kitty did not blend ice with syrup and alcohol, so had basically shot of rum, and long draught of syrup cooled by ice cubes. Still felt compelled to drink entire thing. Shudder. Fell into bed only to awaken in six hours to go babysit. The three girls had just returned from a week at summer camp and were cranky and a half, so babysitting was a bit on the difficult side, but I got through it all ok. Only problem was that I had grabbed 9:30 a.m. instant oatmeal and orange juice and was then unable to eat until after six. Family had ordered pizza for dinner and I thought I would go into drooling seizures before I made it out to the car. Dropped by Amber's to see about bridal shower invitation list and possible feeding. Was promised Mexican dinner out, but somehow was pulled into an extensive shopping expedition followed by factory-style assembly of 100 wedding invitations. 100 is only half of them, eek. Called to David's somewhere in the middle of that to find out if Deidei was in town and when and where the group would go out. Was told that they would leave message on home machine explaining, but returned home at 1:00 a.m. to no message and no answer at David's place. To be honest, it is somewhat relieving as am very tired at present. But would still like to see Deidei and also know if I am scheduled to take Erin home tomorrow evening after babysitting again. Must come up with some sort of eating in midshift plan. Found four good movies for a grand total of $10 today at Kroger. Maybe will settle down to watch one now. Wish I had some bubble bath...